Résumé builders

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(Wikimedia Commons / ChelseaWa)

In preparation for my China trip, I figured it was a good idea to consult with a travel agent because such a venture was beyond any prowess I have about simply arranging for airline tickets and a shuttle bus. It was time to consult a professional.

There happened to be a travel agency in the neighborhood where I pass by frequently, so I stopped in. The staff couldn't have been nicer and were only too pleased to assist. The agent talking with me handed me her business card, which listed her title as "Destination Designer." What an interesting way to indicate what she does, I thought.

That evening at home, I happened to hear a TV commercial in the background as I was doing some emailing, and the product was incontinence supplies. I heard the announcer say, "And one phone call will easily connect you with your personal incontinence consultant."

That job title got my attention. If I had that job, would I really want such a title on my résumé? If someone asked me what I did, would I really say, "I'm a personal incontinence consultant"?

Since it's almost Labor Day in the USA, when we celebrate the blessing of work and the untold contributions to our daily life provided by workers everywhere, I decided it was time to start appreciating personal incontinence consultants.

Then I discovered that there are some really interesting job titles around these days that would look equally interesting on a résumé. Consider these:

  • "Master of disaster" — someone who recovers information after natural calamities;
  • "Director of first impressions" — a front-door receptionist;
  • "Administrator of buzz" — someone in charge of corporate communications;
  • "Digital prophet" — a professional who predicts trends;
  • "Crayon evangelist" — a person who oversees graphic design needs;
  • "Chief cheerleader" — someone who supports the entire team's efforts;
  • "Chief amazement officer" — often reserved for a dynamic CEO;
  • "Coffee cake authority" — self-evident.

I look at my own business card and think, "I must really be a boring individual. What would I have to do to become amazing? Or at least a coffee cake authority?"

[Nancy Linenkugel is a Sylvania Franciscan sister and chair of the department of Health Services Administration at Xavier University, Cincinnati.]